I am married and my marriage has been hell. My husband is a serious womanizer, I have lost count of the number of women he has had sex with only this year. I’ve been dealing with this since 2020. Trust me, I didn’t know he was a womanizer when we were dating, I found out through his phone after having my first baby. It has been hell for me ever since then. The painful part is that he feels no remorse, since he knew I was aware, he didn’t see any need to hide it anymore. Whenever I complain, he rubs it in my face, he tells me he is a man and he has the right to carry as many women as he likes. He added that I don’t expect him to eat one food for d rest of his life just because he married me.
I’ve been dealing with it because his family agrees and support him, my family says the same; all men cheat. Despite sleeping with multiple girls, he doesn’t have sex with condoms because he doesn’t
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like them, even if he starts with them, he removes them in the process. He even pays hookup girls extra just to fuck them raw. I’ve been treating reoccurring infections. He made me a full housewife, he doesn’t allow me to leave the house unless I’m going to the market or clinic. When we were dating, I was a part-time student and was also doing an online business. I was doing well for myself, I took care of my needs because I like being independent. He said that was even one of the reasons why he liked me because I don’t ask him for money, unlike in his previous relationship.
So after I got pregnant, we both agreed to have the baby and our families were happy. I was still in school then but had to stay with him during the corona period. That was when he started showing his real character. He started having issues with my business saying it’s only ashawo that sell things online and that I have too many male contacts since I was selling male wears. That caused issues and I had to stop it for peace to reign. He changed my SIM card and told me that I’ll start a proper business after I put to bed. I chilled and waited without even knowing that I was waiting for the worse to happen.
After having my baby, school resumed again. My baby was just 5 weeks when the exam started, I said I would go and write my exam while my mum helps me watch my baby for just a few hours. His family attacked me and said I don’t value my child, they told me to sacrifice a year to take care of my baby. After then, they started seeing faults in my part-time program as well. They said that I’m too young to be doing part-time and advised me to stop it. My family doesn’t have a say in all these decisions because they have paid my bride price. So that was how I turned into a full housewife and a dropout with a womanizing husband. Last month, I found out about a new girl he was chatting with in March. They have neither talked much nor met at the time, so I just chilled because normally, if I find anything fishy between him and a girl, I just block the number and delete it.
In April, they met at a hotel, when he got back, I saw that he has changed the girl’s number from her real name to a romantic name. He also told the girl that he lives alone, so it’s obvious that they were officially dating after one sex (she must be very good in bed). I took her number just to call her and let her know he is married and he’s a father. After I messaged her, the girl apologized and said she was aware and she would stay away from him. I thought she had sense but she forwarded my message to my husband and called him a liar for deceiving her. My husband called her to apologize and explained, only God knows what he told her, they suddenly became cool and the love became stronger. The girl kept preaching love to him, she tells him how he is her world’s best and how cute he was (my husband is fine and young).
The girl was bursting his head with love, she would PhotoGrid their pictures together and send them to him. She even went as far as saying she wish she could have him forever and guess my husband’s reply; “wishes come true baby, just be good to me and I’m all yours”. While reading their chats, I was in tears and I felt stupid for writing the girl. I confronted my husband but he gave me the insult of my life and warned me to never message his girlfriends again because they are many (in his words). Ever since then, this girl calls my husband anyhow she likes and my husband would go outside to take her calls. I keep seeing the name he saved her number with and it keeps breaking my heart.
She would beg him to leave the house and come spend the night with her and my husband will immediately bring up issues in the house so that he could leave and sleep with his girlfriend, I messaged the girl again to let her know I was aware they were still seeing and the bitch read my message and blocked me. It’s like I made their love stronger. I am tired of the marriage and I don’t know what to do. I don’t have a dime to my name, I want to leave but I don’t have anywhere to go because my family wants me to make it work. We once had a misunderstanding that made him beat me up mercilessly, I ran back home saying I won’t marry again and my parents threw me back to him saying I have no room in my father’s house again as I am now married.
I am still very young, I am 24 years old and I am scared of leaving my life like this forever. All I do is think and cry all day. I want to start making friends with both guys and ladies too, I don’t want to cheat on my husband but I want to have friends I can talk to at any time. Just matured minds only, if anybody is interested I will be in the comment section. I need your advice please.
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